Little, Swalpa, Konjam, Ithiri, 'Extra Spice’

‘Spice up your life man!’ was one of the most commonly used catch phrase during college. It was the easiest way to coax your friends for a movie or for a late night party. Then, I loved this wacky statement, as I thought it was just a kick ass line that could empower anyone.

Strangely, now, I hear this phrase from a certain sect of people over and over again. These are people who are supposedly in a ‘relationship’ or are ‘married’ to the one they thought was very special. Whenever, I raise a few questions about the authenticity of marriage, my married friends say, "Chillax gal, everybody needs some extra spice in life'!

The other day, I read this news bit about a techie who smothered his wife to death in Bangalore and then killed himself. The guy, a infy geek, had apparently suspected his wife’s fidelity and had pictures of her with her ‘alleged’ boyfriend gathered. On gaining substantial evidence, he resorted to this extreme step.

Ah, nope, I am not writing this in support of the guy nor due to any empathy towards the gal. Their story just gave me the right news peg for my next blog. ‘Fidelity’, ‘illicit relationship’ “extra-marital affairs’ are all quite fancy but a dangerous predicament. Of late, I have come across a lot of married couple, who are not quite content with their marriage. Be it a love marriage or an arranged marriage, both forms seem to be taking a beating. Some of the common reasons: “You never give me my space”, “You think I didn’t notice you ogling at your friend’s girlfriend”, “you don’t satisfy my wants completely”, “Having a fuck all sex life”, “I meet my husband once a year”, “She doesn’t keep my mum and dad happy!” and the best of all is “Unfortunately, I found my true love after marriage”!

Well, seems like genuine problem all of them. So where lies the solution? Divorce? Hmm… may be, but not exactly. Believe me, that’s not even an option these guys think about. For such couple, everything else is genuine than a divorce. I am quite sure, its not that they still believe, marriage is a ‘janam janam ka’ bond and stuff. They know that filing for a divorce, attending those meaningless counceling sessions, paying the lawyer everyday for his chai paani and worse waiting for a minimum of four years for a legal separation! Uff... that’s indeed quite a lot of work! An extra-marital affair now, seems like the next best bet.

Are you wondering why I say this? Everyone has a problem or two with their spouse. However, the reason at times ain’t just strong enough to separate from each other completely. It is possible to manage and live with each other despite these differences keeping in mind the family sentiments and the brutal societal treatment. But how? Huh… “just add some extra spice machii!”

Afterall, who would mind a double dhamaka offer? A 24-hr maid service at home or a chalta phirta male companion as a symbol of security is no harm right? And for your other requirements, there’s always room for another person who can fulfill the needs that your dear husband or wife is unable to.

Now, this is exactly the kinda spice that pisses me off. People don’t realize that these spicy ingredients, gives way to physical and mental abuse, depression, trauma for family, mental block in children and so on so forth. I believe, it is really not bad, to call off such a lose-hanging relationship and start afresh. If nothing helps in a steady married life, its better to call it off. But that’s exactly where the crux of the problem is. Its not practical for someone to wait for six years to get a legal separation. So in which case all the above spice is automatically added.

So then what is the solution? Blame the Judiciary? Blame the culture? Blame the society? Or yourself, for choosing ‘the one’. Difficult to answer and depressing to think. Its tough to take a call.

"Blame it on me" by Akon

The Incredibles: Part 1

Cheers to the long night yapping sessions, to the glasses that gave us a high, to the dance floors that beared our weight, to the restaurants that have been victims of our loud and wild celebrations and finally, cheers to the gang which consists of 'Sesky' people :D


Its been a year of complete exuberance, highly dramatic in terms of career and highly special in terms of the times we have spent together. I don quite remember how the seven members in the group came so close to each other. Hyderabad has been unexpectedly special and cherishable. Relocating to a new city of strangers, trying to build a rapport with anybody who came your way and attempting to know to kick it all off and make a few friends. Finally one by one, all seven to nine of us started interacting with one another, mainly coz of the cities we hail from, speaking a common language and having the same wave lenghth just helped all of us kick it all off. Gradually, we started hanging out as a group in coffee shops, restaurants for dinner, going shopping, going pubbing and finally crashing at someone's place gossiping and watching movies.

Each one of us are completely different set of individuals. The irony being 2 of us sharing the same name. It takes me quite by surpise as to how both of us hit it off when we are like north pole and a south pole. The guys are ultimate museum peices. Four of them, so well knit with one another that no matter how much the others try to fit in with them thats quite unlikely to happen. These tall men have distinct characteristics to the extent that one would only waste their time trying to figure out wat on earth got'em together. So, do they eva fight? Of course yes! guess wat, they fight, they fight to the extent of abusing one another and telling each other stay away from ma zone. The Zone- Hot chicks :D

Sharing a lunch table with em every afternoon has been the most exciting part of all this. Luckily for me, as an ardent cricket follower the codes 'mid-off' 'long-on' 'slip' wasnt all that hard to figure out. The excitement in their eyes on seeing the best faces, the best bodies and the best features knew no bounds. However, those sentences that required to be censored were thoughtfully passed on to each other's ear without letting us [the girlies] being a part of it.

Darling, as I call one of the guys, is the utmost entertainment. His one liners are highly cheezy but quite cute nevertheless. Oh, he has quitta fan following. Agreed, bugger is tall and handsome. But the big question we all ask is, Y is it that he neva succeeds in his attempts to find his better half? This question is bigger than that of, Will India sign the N-deal? He is modesty personified, cricket frenzy, very conscious of his dressing, wacky humor and girls luv calling him Spikey :D I admire this fella for a lotta reasons. He isnt expressive abt his feelings for friends, but has given us each a special place in his life where we are free to be outright frank with him, bully him to the extent that he pleads and we finally oblige. Darling, u rock da. I seriously wish u get lucky soon :) I have enjoyed every second in your company and I must say, I will cherish this friendship for a lifetime :)

Thendi, hahah now this is quite a challenging blank to fill. Thendi and I share a special bond. That of an unofficial husband and wife. How, when and why? Well... thats a suspense that I wouldn't quite like to share. Thendi, as we call him is the most reliable, sensitive, intelligent and highly regarded member of the group. If ther's anything priceless about this guy thats his dance :) Music can drive him nuts and dance floor and turn on his every single nerve. He cares two hoots about whose watching, hez there to have fun and only fun. Poor guy has been the victim of my mood swings, actually all our mood swings. He has also been the love guru for some. He patiently lends a ear to anybodies love story, the mind is working but mouth is zipped. Finally after everything, he has thins knack of coming up with a single statement thats would be like a whirpool and will remain in your head forever. Hes a complete family man, not highly patriotic though :) Hez one to watch out for while in a theatre. He will shout to the loudest with swear words if the movie makes no sense to him and rips it apart aloud. Timing, oh ho hez so perfect when it comes to this Huh! [Sarcastic really] late to bed and late to rise. Like darling, thendi too has his own set of followers. He admires, adores, ogles and can be dumb founded on seeing a pretty face. Nevertheless, he neva goes overboard and act crazy. We have sat overnight talking about relationships, women and men. Intense arguments and thought but all of which made complete sense. Thendi, is greatly gifted. He can sit on a chair and go off to sound sleep when someone is actually talking to him. Count 3o seconds and thendi can snore away in any position he is in :)

In a big gang as ours, its hard to believe that the absence of one person can do any harm. I so wish this was true. Reality bites! The fact is when the most important link of your website fails, the layout, the content and everything else falls apart. Tats exactly the case here. If thendi aint in picture, the whole frame looks dull. I will cherish every moment we have spent together, the drives, the speedy bike rides and the times we have all together spent. The fact is we all are at this very important juncture in our careers where goodbyes will come all too soon. I will surely miss the phrases 'Sheadup' 'Bastard' etc etc and loads n loads of memories thats carved in ma mind :D

'Partner', another manly character. Hez the perfect ditcher :) Any plans made be rest assured that one person is gonna miss it n thats him. He is a cutie pie and referred by one of the girls as 'sweetheart'. He has a make belief world of his own, where his friends and of course a 'going around' girlfriend and his mom are the only crew. Hez handsome and can give a complex to the other men. This quiet, shy and mommy boy has been ma sole inspiration when it comes to thinking of shedding weight sumtime :) I so remember how I hated this guy when he initially joined the organisation. He would go all around ppl's desk dropping a hi to everyone except me and no prizes for guessing wat i felt abt this man. Suddenly after a few months, things changed and he's been a part of all our outings, the pondi trip, dinners etc. A tip for anybody who wants this man dead. Hide his mobile for an hour and job done :) All this apart, hez indeed been a great friend who makes u feel so comfortable around him. Hez the kid of the group whose just touched 20 and has a long way to go.






Its been a complete swirl this one and half year. Low's and high's, twists and turns in professional and personal life and its all the more exciting when such situations are shared with some lovely people like this. Hyderabad wudn't have been any special without 'the incredibles'. People with complete different views, all game for some fun and most importantly a well knit group that understand each other so perfectly well. I hate this juncture I am at where I see things falling apart and all of us moving in different directions. Goodbyes are never easy and the worse is they keep coming to ruin it all. But thats what makes life so beautiful i guess, the challenge lying within us to pick ourselves up from these situations and move on to meet new and more great people in life. Hey.. this is definitely not ma good bye blog to Hyderabad but am hoping it will come soon :) watch out for the 'sesky ladies' description in Part 2 :D

Missing something Guru?

The buzz a year back in Karnataka was so intense that I took it for granted that the newpapers in Karnataka had virtually died. Maybe, the monotony of following dry politics or the boredom of following our Desi cricketers for a quote, all drove the reporters helter skelter for news that they finally ended up landing at Hubli. This time they were out chasing none other but the Guru himself along with his filmi and asli gharwali Aishwarya.


Mediapersons had more than one reason to chase them. Firstly, for a verdict on their then going secret affair and secondly, for a tip-off on Mani Ratnam's Guru. Tight lipped as ever, nothing spilled out of either of the actors or the great Ratnam. Secondly, instances like Aishwarya's minor accident during the shoot all gave them enough spices to keep their readers interest. The villagers in Banapur and around Hubli gathered at the shooting spot and at a point the mob became uncontrollable that police had to resort to lathi charge. Whatever said and done, after nearly 14 months the movie is on the big screen and above all, the story reflects the growth of Reliance founder Dhirubhai Ambani. "The script and the story of the movie are purely fictional. Infact, fictions come from reality and hence Guru is just a reflection of anybody's story and not necessarily about any particular individual" said the Junior Bachchan at a TV show when asked to clarify. Director, Mani Ratnam takes the same stand and for obvious reasons.

Now, a spectator can relate this movie very well to the man who left behind a new world called the Reliance. Guru, a young lad, who is often taken by neck by this headmaster father leaves to Istanbul to work with his uncle. Finally, on getting there the boy starts off by selling petrol cans. Oh, what an irony. Dhirubhai started his career selling petrol cans too. Moving on, the boy who completed eight years in the company is recognised for his hardwork and is promoted with a high pay but not before he wears on a tie as insisted by the Phirang. Guru, a mature lad by then pleasently refuses the offer and says, "if the 'Gore's' think I am a capable man then why should I work for them". And rightly so!

On coming back to his village, he starts thinking about starting a bijnas and here's where his friend comes into the picture and Guru strikes a deal with him of marrying his sister who had left the house in trust of another man but was promptly deceived. ( Sensible man ;))

Victorious and resourceful with a wife, a good sum of dowry and a 50 per cent partner in the business, Guru heads to Mumbai to realise his dream. Well... what bijas was he thinking? Exactly what Dhirubhai thought-Polyster. With the corruption and rich men involved in the game, Guru had to resort to playing tricks. The scene I enjoyed the most was where he meets a minister to get licence approved for his petro project and is well aware of the fact that the minister is a clean man. The nervous yet confident Guru sits face to face with the minister and puts across that a relative had left behind a gift for the minister and that he has no idea where to deliver or what to do with it. Hmm...I heard Dhiru had something similar to offer to Rajiv Gandhi in the name of mommy Indira Gandhi. Now... isnt this turning a true fiction.

On a more serious note, in three hours Abhishek has managed to convey a stong message that w "It happens only in India". In the movie, Guru runs a textile factory that has foreign investors and middle-class share holders who have invested in the company. The factory produces Goods that is thrice its actual capacity. Nanaji-Mithun da, hits the nail on the head with the dialogue: "Tumhari khaas baat yah hain ki tum dimakh or zaban ek saath chalathe ho". This is exactly what takes him to the heights of glory.

So, besides going ga ga only over Guru, I also noticed the aging Aishwarya who portrays Sujatha, a hindustani nari, who stands by her husband on any given day. Unlike her other movies, her presence in Guru is absolutely nill. Her onscreen presence is not felt and neither are her dialogues catchy. Her plunging-wide backcut blouses may have left some drooling but that apart Sujatha is a plain character that has no colour nor depth. Mani Ratnam's effort to make her look a young 'gaon-ki-chori' with her lehenga's and then show her coming off age with silk sarees and gajra around her hairbunch has hardly made any impact. Even while dancing in the rain or sitting beside her husband and doing a vox-pop, she hardly creates magic on the screen. Maybe its those days when a certain age shows and there's nothing much the make-up man can change.

Madhavan on the other hand shows a lot more energy, it might well have to do with the journalistic role he portrays. But overall, he is something to look out for as he slyly takes away the momentum from Abhishek for a few minutes. The scene where he visits the Shakti factory and questions Guru's mama on the company details just left everyone in the theatre with a wide open mouth. Meenu-Vidya Balan, looked to me like a time wasting tactic. Even writing a couple of lines on the character would make this reading a unnecessary drag. Mithun da obviously plays the second best role. The part where he pulls his editor for having accepted a bribe from Guru Kant Desai and publishing articles in favour of Guru gets the real journalist in him.

And finally to the climax, Guru appears before of an enquiry commission for a hearing against him on charges of corruption. The scene that was captured in one single shot completely fails to satisfy the audience (or ME) who expected Guru to pass some whacky dialogues that would put our corrupt officials to shame. However, he lets the entire movie tumble in that fifteen-minute explanation where he explains to the commission his story of having made way from rags to riches which was anyway what the movie showed rather than he having to go over it all again. He explains that he did everything from kicking those who had to be and feeding those that had to be fed. Justified? In a way, but what is with the perception that everything is acceptable when you talk in terms of `janta ka aadmi' or 'aam aadmi' or `a middle class entrepreneur' out to help the public and raise the standards of middle class. Well... if that is what it takes for a middle class to reach for the stars then we should drop the judiciary and let the Guru's be!

A warm welcome indeed!!!

After days of serious negotiations with well-wishers like dad, mom and sis, i finally decided to visit home last week. With this, my vow not to visit home ever again came crashing down, forcing me to accept defeat at the hands of my family. In a bid to put the bad memories behind, i gracefully accepted the invitation (putforth by my neice) and left on a wednesday night after completing a couple of reporting assignments that hardly took any time.

Railways failed to offer me a seat and hence i chose the next best economic mode of transport- the bus. One hour in the bus and i decided never to travel by an A/C bus ever again. I literally froze, thanks to the kerchief like blanket. Just when i began to warm myself with a denim jacket and get some sleep, the lights went on and the conductor tapped me indicating it was time to get down. It was 4 am and there i was standing, shivering and chattering. The autowala demanded Rs 140 almost double the actual rate. After bargaining for a good ten minutes he finally agreed for Rs 70 but not before taking an elderly couple along who were to get down on the way.With the 100 ft road dug up for flyover construction, the driver took us through narrow and unfamiliar lanes scaring the hell out of me. My mind kept wandering, thinking about all the possibile crimes that could happen. Finally, after twenty minutes of breathtaking ride, i reached my destination and hit the sack right away.

Next day it was time for a long chat with mom and convince her that this time around my purpose of visiting home was not friends but family. My neice, the two and a half year old brat, was all smiles on seeing me. The day was peaceful and home food never tasted this good.

But things dint remain the same, Friday was a fateful day. Getting up late is quite acceptable at home and hence i over slept. Later, it was time to complete some formalities of filling up a few forms for my neice's nursery admission. It was already 2 pm and my stomach was growling. Mom was yet to cook, but i decided to wait and have home food as i knew i would soon be deprived of it for the next few months. But luck had it otherwise, we ran out of LPG and hence not a vegetable was boiled. The next minute i took the bike and headed towards a hotel to pack some yum food. However, it was not a jolly good ride, as my mind kept wavering about some unpleasant incidents a few days prior to that. Somehow, i managed to enter the colony gate without a glitch and saw a herd of school students who occupied the entire road. Honking my way through i managed to reach a little further, telling myself to watch out for these little ones on the road. An accident was the last thing i wanted. Just then a girl, walking an inch ahead of my bike, onto my right side turned abruptly and crossed the road. Losing control of the bike and realizing i was going to knock her, i applied the brakes taking complete left, lost balance, skid and glided a good 10 feet and the bike came tumbling down on my foot. With this the trip not only became unpleasant i also had to go through a few tortures of taking shots and gulping yukky drugs.

Water Privatisation

"Most universities are seriously considering abandoning coke after it created such a massive campaign": Alan Sitow

By Dhanya Lakshmanan

CHENNAI: Most colleges and universities in the United States are planning to boycott the use of Coca-cola in the wake of the crisis involving the company and the Kerala Government, said Alan Sitow, a documentary film maker from US.
He spoke to a group of environmentalists, corporates and social activists at the screening of his documentary, `Thirst', at Loyola college on Thursday. Sitow said that the massive strike campaign against the soft drink company, Coco-cola, in Palakkad has led to numerous debates across America. "Most of them are seriously considering abandoning coke after it created such a massive campaign," he said.
Meanwhile, his co-director Deborah Kaufman spoke about water privatisation and said that it was painstaking to see the most important natural resource in the world being sold to corporate companies in the name of globalisation. The 62-minute film is about the agitation campaigns against the same in Bolivia, California and India.
Sitow and Deborah Kaufman were in the city to screen their documentary. The short film has created a shock wave in America. This is the first time the film has been screened outside the US. The film also shows images from the World Water Forum 2003, in Kyota, Japan. The forum included politicians, international bankers and corporate executives who were present to decide on who will take control over water supplies. Meanwhile, experts and environmentalists from across the world accused the forum of acting against people's will. Every activist present said that water is a human commodity and not a material that has to be traded in an open market.
The film focuses on the Bolivian campaign against their government that was planning to privatise water. The protest march and violence that followed in Bolivia on the matter, forced the Bolivian government to acknowledge the people's demand. The only Indian in the film, opposing privatisation was Rajendra Singh, a social activist from Rajasthan.
The documentary also highlights the citizen coalition of Stockton, California which questioned the government's plan of selling water to private companies. Hundreds gathered on the streets, holding banners reading, `Let the people vote' and `Do not sell water', pushed the tempo of the film further.
Meanwhile, Dr V Suresh, General Secretary of People's Union For Civil Liberties (PUCL), Tamil Nadu and Pondicherry, said that America is thinking of new methods of carrying water and selling it. "New techniques are being propelled to transport water from places like Canada to Southern American cities by using a material that looks more like the enlarged version of a condom, and is also made of rubber," he said.